Dear self circa 2007,
It's 7:26am. I know you aren't reading this letter. You aren't reading this because it's your day off. And because it's 7:26am, and most importantly because you are 23.
In a couple months you are going to go to your sisters wedding and believe it or not, just two weeks later you will be engaged yourself. Gone will be the days of lazing around watching hours of television and spending seemingly endless amounts of time and money doing whatever you want. You'll have to smarten up! You'll be getting married after all.
Just a few short months from now you will have a box, filled with business cards, price lists, receipts etc. So much information and details you won't have anything else on your brain. You will be socializing while dieting, working out details, and your body. It will be the best day of your life as it should be with all that planning and time.
And one day it will all be over. You will have been the Princess who married her Prince Charming. You will be deliriously happy just as you were when you met 7 years prior. It was the successful day you had always planned. But now it's over. You are back and work and have lots to talk with clients about, but nothing to do when you go home. So back you go to sleeping in and staying up late. Partying on the weekends and weddings every other week. And even though they aren't yours, you love every one.
But then something happens. Something crazy. In the year following your wedding you started gaining weight. You got uncomfortable in your body. Your feet would swell after working and you thought you might snap your flip flops. Your clothes are all too tight. You are hungry ALL THE TIME, but then when you eat, you are practically sprinting to the bathroom as it comes back up on you. It's like you are bigger and always hungover, except you can't sleep either.
Now don't be scared, you actually wanted this to happen. I know right? You asked for this. You also asked to spend endless nights and money on someone other than yourself. Even more time than you will spend planning your wedding! I know it's hard to believe. Doesn't sound much like the fairy tale wedding you will have. Oh and you will also have to stop drinking. I know, not even a shot. Not one. Oh and you probably won't be going out that much either. You will be getting a big pay cut at work too. Oh and a new roommate!
I forgot about the new roommate.
You and Aaron are going to buy your first house and you are going to now spend your time decorating for your new roommate. You don't know when he/she will be moving in or if he/she is male or female. You would prefer a female because cleaning up after one boy is enough. Plus you need an ally when voting on future decisions in your new house. Well.....this roommate might not be what you expect. You haven't met him/her before. She is moving in sight unseen. She doesn't clean up after herself. Actually, she is quite messy. I heard some people like her even use the bathroom on you. I know, gross. Oh and she needs you to feed and bath her. And she doesn't pay any rent. She doesn't even drive.
Now don't get discouraged, because once she is here, she won't care if you look like you did when you got married. She won't care if your hair isn't done or you don't feel beautiful. She will love you with all her heart. And in a few years later she will tell you just that. All the time. And guess what? You will love her too. She still wont pay rent, and sometimes she will still use the bathroom at inopportune times, but mostly in the bathroom. She will actually cost you more money now than she did before. And while your work only cut your pay for a year, you will now spend every last cent on her instead of yourself.
I'm so proud of you. You have become so selfless. You don't do much for yourself anymore and it's like you don't mind. You do have days where you want to rip your hair out but it passes and you go on doing everything you can making your little roommate happy. So much so that you thought you needed another roommate.
You never thought there could be another roommate that would be as good as the one you got. She is so special. But believe it or not, your next room mate is pretty awesome too. She's a party animal. She loves to stay up late. You will be impressed by how crazy she can act on such little sleep. She's a real live wire.
And just like the first roommate, she does use the bathroom on you. And actually did yesterday. But soon she will be using the bathroom like the rest of us.
I'm sure by now you are thinking I'm just talking crazy, but no. It's the truth. This is the life you chose to have. And while you may be thinking you can't believe that after 2010 you don't get to sleep in anymore, or even at all, and even though, you always seem broke because your bills have more than doubled, you are happy.
YOU ARE REALLY HAPPY.
You've actually never been happier in your life. It's crazy that with all that change it's possible. But you don't even know you could be this happy. Your life is now all about your special little room mates. Cause that's just it, they are yours. You grew them and you and Aaron raise them. You really will devote your life to all things that make their lives better. You really have changed in the best way possible. So on those days that just aren't so good, think of where you are going, and I will think of just how far you will have come.
Oh yeah, they have the best nick name for you too. They call you Mommy.
Sincerely yourself circa 2014
-Natalie
"Just dance. It's gonna be ok." -Lady Gaga